Helping Your Child When They Say, "There’s Nothing to Do!"
The Spring Break dilemma
Every parent has heard their child say, “There’s nothing to do!” especially during breaks from school. With Spring Break coming up, it’s a good time to think about this common complaint.
At first, it sounds like a simple expression of boredom. But as parents, we might feel guilty, frustrated, or even annoyed. Sometimes, if we’re in a good mood, we might respond with energy—at least the first couple of times!
The problem is that we often react instead of respond, which usually doesn’t help either of us.
Reacting vs. Responding
Reacting is a quick, emotional response that doesn’t involve much thought. For example, snapping back when someone criticizes you is a reaction.
Responding, on the other hand, is more thoughtful. It involves taking a moment to consider the situation and choosing a deliberate action. For instance, understanding the criticism and addressing it calmly is a response.
In short, reacting is impulsive, while responding is intentional.
Instead of seeing their statement as an annoyance, we can turn it into a chance for learning. For example, we might say, “I understand that not knowing what to do can be frustrating. Let’s come up with some ideas together. Why don’t you start?”
This approach is similar to what teachers do when students feel bored or frustrated. It’s an opportunity to motivate them to explore new activities while keeping them engaged in learning.
A Helpful Perspective from Dr. Dan Siegel
Dr. Dan Siegel, who has written many books including The Whole-Brain Child, suggests that we should help our kids think and listen rather than just reacting. This can really help when they say they’re bored.
So, the next time you hear, “There’s nothing to do,” consider sharing this idea with your child. It can help them realize that boredom can lead to new opportunities. Learning to explore what they can do instead of feeling stuck can open up exciting possibilities.
It’s also helpful to understand how our brains work. I’ve linked a video where Dr. Siegel explains it in a simple way and it’s a video that elementary children can understand.
I hope this advice helps, and I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences. Remember, there’s always something to do!